SexEd with Carlisle Cullen
by FrankieQuinn13
Summary: The students of Forks and La push high experience sexEd with everyone's favorite vampire doctor. But what suprises wait for Carlisle himself, obvious hints at slash Jakeward or rather Edcob included. Rated M for helth class descriptions
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Good day duckies!**

**So like, I wanted to write a story in which Carlisle experiences extreme confusion and shock, so I figured what better way than to make him teach a sexEd class for the Cullens and the pack.**

**There are a lot of drawn out explanations I know but the story isn't half bad, specially when the vampires and wolves start asking some interesting questions.**

**P.S: for those interested, the next chapter of **_**Fault **_**should be up in the next few days, definitely before Monday (take note, I'm working on South African time) and the next update will carry two chapters. I'm just ironing out a few details, this one-shot was written on the side when inspiration suddenly struck.**

**Apologies spelling, grammar and OOCness.**

**Disclaimer: let's see... Sparkling vampires? Check. Completely illogical ability to get an erection without a pulse? Check. The plague that is Bella Swan? Check. Edward choosing Bella instead of Jacob who he clearly belongs with? Check. Conclusion; there is no way I could possibly be responsible for the Twilight franchise in any way whatsoever. The blame for that goes to Stephanie Meyer.**

"Good morning." Carlisle said in a clear but low voice, somehow managing to speak over the crowd of teenagers that sat on the bleachers in the school gym.

The loud roar of talking grew softer as the doctor looked over them and smiled when he saw his children getting along so well with the shifters or rather he was glad to see his children looking a lot less hostile as they sat much closer to the shifters than they would usually allow.

It had been quite a surprise when the principle of Forks high called and asked the blonde doctor to come in and do the yearly health class lecture for the schools upper classmen not only for the students of Forks, but for the kids on the reservation as well.

Apparently the school district officials thought it would be easier if they just did a joint class instead of sending a professional to do the class for each school on different days.

They were all teenagers going through the same thing after all, so what harm could a little inter-school bonding do?

Of course, since the doctor knew that most if not all the wolves were highschool students, Carlisle had been concerned when he found out that they'd be forced into a room with a coven of vampires. After all tempers were sure to flare and he really didn't think that a group of natives turning into wolves the size of horses in the school gym would go down very well with the human population.

Thankfully there didn't seem to be a problem, well not yet anyway.

Carlisle let his gold eyes scan the crowd as the low hum of talking decreased.

Most of the quiluetes were sitting together mixing in with the humans and talking to the many curious teens who weren't used to seeing the natives anywhere outside of the reservation, while the Cullen kids sat to one side as always as separate from the humans as possible. Which wasn't very far mind you, but it would have to do.

Of course Carlisle had no illusions about this temporary cease fire lasting very long after the quileutes were taken back to the reservation, but he hoped that the semi peaceful air could spark some civil behaviour on both sides in the future.

As Carlise prepared to speak he resisted a frown at when he caught sight of Seth, the only one of the wolves that didn't seem to mind sitting too close to the Cullens as he sat beside Jasper, while the empath gazed down at the boy with a fond smile.

While Jasper's attention on Seth was a bit odd, what had the doctor resisting a frown was the boy's presence at Forks at all.

He hadn't known that any of the younger reservation students would be attending the class as well, but judging from some of the younger looking shifters upfront they apparently were.

The sire briefly wondered if this was the principals doing or simply Sam wanting the pack to have as much back up as possible.

Alice sat on Jasper's other side with Rosalie and Emmett sitting behind them. Rosalie didn't seem to be paying much attention to her mate as she seemed much too busy on her phone while Emmett kept glancing over towards the wolves with his arms crossed over his chest and a slight pout on his lips.

Had they gotten into a fight?

But Rosalie and Emmett never stay angry at each other for too long, so what could possibly have happened to make them behave this way?

How strange.

But the strangest of all had to be Edward.

The telepath sat beside Bella, the girl was leaning against his chest with her one of her hands wrapped around his as she spoke completely unaware of the vampires gaze which seemed to be fixed elsewhere.

On one of the wolves actually.

This time Carlisle couldn't fight a frown.

The shifters all seemed to be acting a little strangely as well. Embry sat between Jacob and Quil, ducking his head down low as a dark blush stayed stubbornly on his face. Jacob had turned his body so he was facing away from the Cullen's side, fidgeting uncomfortably as he kept his gaze up ahead and raked a hand through his short hair every so often.

Leah sat next to Paul who sat next to Quil and Jared, seeming to toss a look over at Seth every now and then. Of course that isn't all that odd since anyone with eyes could see that she was incredibly protective over her little brother. The only one that seemed normal was Paul, although he wasn't his usual angry self, there's nothing abnormal about a teenager focusing all their attention on their cellphone either.

The doctor took a deep unnecessary breath when he had deemed it quiet enough to speak, doing his best not to flinch at the heavy scent of wet dog that hung in the air.

"I'm sure I've met most of you, so most of you know who I am but for those who don't, I am doctor Carlisle Cullen. I'm a physician, at Forks memorial hospital. And I was asked here today to conduct a lecture on sexual education."

Some of the students shifted uncomfortably while, some were already trying had not to laugh and the Cullen kids looked more or less the same.

Of course after witnessing his children's romantic escapades over the passed fifty years, Carlisle really doesn't expect much of a reaction from any of them.

"I understand that some of you may be a bit uncomfortable with this particular subject, but believe me when I say that the discussion today will be beneficial to all of you in order to maintain a safe and healthy sexual life." The blonde shifted his weight a bit from one foot to another, when a girl he recognised as Jessica Stanley raised her hand, "This will be a lecture so I'm going to ask you to please hold all questions until the end, at which point I'll answer any queries you may have."

Jessica seemed to give a brief huff before sinking back into her seat and he continued. "Before we start, I'd like to make it clear that while I'm sure that some of you are already engaging in sexual activities, it is still best to remind you that sex is a very intimate act and shouldn't be taken lightly. That's why it's important to do it with someone you truly care about since the memories of your first time will follow you into your adult life and could hold disastrous emotional and psychological after effects."

"To start off I'll explain how basic sexual intercourse works as well as oral sex, masturbation along with a few myth's that have followed these methods over the years. Then I'll discuss the various methods of contraception after which I will answer any questions you might have." Carlisle explained with a smile as he pulled the microphone off of the stand that had been set up in front of him and pulled the cord a bit so he could move around freely.

"First, I'll explain basic sexual intercourse. Now I'm sure you're all aware of the basic mechanics to how sex between a man and a woman works but just to be clear: it works by a man inserting his erect penis into a woman's vagina, thrusting in and out until ejaculation." Some of the students gaped while others stared at Carlisle with horrified expressions and the doctor just gave them an amused smile. "Forgive me for being so blunt, but I think it would be best to explain everything as it is and not use any drawn out metaphors as to avoid any confusion that might occur. Oral sex works more or less in the same way, with the exception of the male's penis going into another's mouth or in the case of female oral sex, one would use their tongue to breach through the hymen into the vagina. Next we have masturbation, which I'm sure most if not all of you are familiar with."

A few students grinned while others shrank back into their seats, Mike Newton was smiling to himself as he stared off into space.

"For those of you who honestly don't know, masturbation entails seeking out sexual gratification my stimulating your genitals without any outside assistance. Men use their hands to stroke and pull at their penis' until they reach their climax while women can use their hands or any inanimate aid to breach their vagina's and stimulate themselves until orgasm."

"Now, I'm sure you've all heard the myths and so called facts on sexual intercourse and I'm sure many of them sound very convincing but some of them are built on nothing but pure speculation. For example, one myth suggests that masturbation can lead to blindness in men or some other horrible physical deformity. This is not true. Believe me when I say that the act is perfectly healthy and normal especially for those not receiving sexual stimulation from an outside source. Another myth suggests that a woman cannot get pregnant if it's her first time, also not true. Regardless of whether or not you've had sex before you can still get pregnant as long as you are in your ovulation period and in some cases women have been documented to falling pregnant I'd the midst of their menstruation cycle. Other myths suggest that sexual intercourse in a bathtub, standing up etcetera etcetera, lowers the chances of pregnancy or the transmission of sexually transmitted diseases or STD's. I'm sorry to inform you that none of these myths are true and in no way lower the risks that follow along with sex."

Carlisle turned and took a few steps to the right, "That being said there are proven ways of lowering these risks. Take note that these methods are in no way fool proof, but simply lower the chances of pregnancy or the transferrance of STD's by a certain percentage. Such methods include the usage of condoms, which is a thin rubber sheath which is worn over a man's penis during sexual intercourse. These sheaths come in many different sizes brands and even flavours for those who use it for oral sex. They work in the way of covering the man's penis in-order to prevent skin on skin contact to avoid the trasnferrance of diseases and infections, and also contain the semen that's dispensed during the ejaculation process to prevent pregnancy. There are also female condoms which work in the same way as male condoms with the exception of the condom being inserted into the vagina. While condoms are a popular choice of contraceptive, it's important to know that they are in no way one hundred percent effective as the condoms can break or tear and are in some cases completely ineffective in preventing the transference of some diseases like the human papillomavirus."

"Another similar method of contraception is a diafragm which is a shallow flexible rubber cup which is inserted into the vagina to prevent sperm from reaching the egg. And the last one is the birth control pill, which releases a set of hormones in-order to prevent pregnancy. While both of these methods are very effective in the art of preventing pregnancy they are not guaranteed contraceptives and do not prevent the transferrence of STD's. It is important to use caution whenever using any of these sexual contraception methods and to consult a doctor before hand if possible."

Carlisle then turned to face the crowd of students some of which seemed to be strangely enlightened while others were wearing bright blushes on their faces.

"Now, if any of you have any questions, anything you're wondering about or you're perhaps not sure of please ask now. And don't worry about embarrassing yourself, if you are wondering about something it's more than likely that someone else in the gym today is wondering the same thing. So please, if there are any questions ask them now."

The entire gym seemed to go completely silent for a moment until a brunette in the back started whispering to the girl beside her, seeming to argue with her for a moment as she nudged her with her elbow until the raven raised her hand and Carlisle smiled. "Yes, ms. Weber."

The girl stood up albeit a bit awkwardly with a dark blush on her face as all eyes turned towards her, "Is it true that... Well that, is it safer to..." Angela gave a sigh before speaking quickly, "Isittruethatitsafertohaveanalsexthannormalsex." The girl sank back down into her seat and the other students frowned in confusion as they couldn't really make out what she had said and it probably would have been safer to have the girl repeat her question a bit slower, but Carlisle heard the question quite clearly with his vampire hearing and decided to show the mortified girl a little mercy.

"It appears ms. Stanley asked ms. Weber to ask whether or not anal sex is safer than normal vaginal sex." Carlisle said causing the brunette to flush while some of the students around her began to snicker. "The answer is no, there are actually more risks concerning anal sex then there are vaginal sex as that is not what the human rectum was made for." Some of the students laughed and Carlisle smiled in return. "It's important to show caution with this type of intercourse, because even though you certainly can't get pregnant that way you are more than capable of getting an STD or infection of some sort. Next question."

"Yes, ms. Swan." Carlisle smiled at his future daughter in-law as she slowly stood still holding onto Edwards hand, while a light blush spread over her face.

"Is it true that it... hurts, the first time?"

"For most women it does, there's always a certain amount of pain during sex however the first time does seem to be the most intense as that is the time that the hymen is torn. Of course the hymen can be torn through a number of ways such as certain types of exercise or masturbation but the most common is sexual intercourse."

Another girl in the back raised her hand, "Yes, ms. Dowling."

"Is there a way to stop it from hurting?"

"No, I'm afraid there isn't." Carlisle could see multiple eyes in the audience widen and he held back a chuckle, "But I assure you the pain doesn't last too long and when done safely no damage is left behind from the act. Mr. Yorkie?"

Eric stood up and Mike gave him a grin as he spoke, "Earlier you said that some condoms were flavoured, for oral sex. Do you feel anything when you use them that way?"

"Yes. Just like you're able to feel through the condom when you have normal sexual intercourse. The latex sheath is thin enough to allow physical sensations through to the penis while protecting it from any diseases that may be transferred since oral sex can also lead to the contraction of STD's."

"Any more questions?" The hall was silent again and Carlisle gave the crowd a brief once over when Rosalie raised her hand and he frowned wondering what on earth his daughter was up to. But not wanting to look suspicious the doctor still called on her, "Yes, Rosalie."

"What if you don't need contraceptives, is it still necessary to use them?"

The entire hall turned to stare at the girl in confusion and Carlisle bit back a sigh.

What on earth is she doing?

"Unless you are married or celibate, there will never be a time when you will not need to use contraceptives."

"But if you don't need them, what then?"

Carlisle was surprised to hear a voice speak up among the wolves and frowned at Paul who seemed to be staring right at him, honestly waiting for the doctor to answer.

"Well, I suppose then you won't have to use them. But like I said before, no matter what the health status of your partner may be it's important to exercise caution during sexual intercourse in-order to avoid any unfortunate events."

Another hand went up and Carlisle spoke wondering what on earth had come over his children, "Edward."

"You never discussed gay sex."

Carlisle's eyes widened for the briefest of moments, "Excuse me?"

"Sexual intercourse between two men." Edward said causing Bella to stare up at him with a frown and the rest of the human audience to snicker while Edward just sent a smirk over towards Jacob, making the wolf look away with a light blush on his face. "How does that work?"

The doctor stared back in slight shock wondering where on earth _that _question came from, but decided to question his son about it later after all there could be a million reasons why Edward wanted to know.

"Well, it works in the same way as sexual intercourse between a man and a woman, with the only difference being that you insert the penis in the anal cavity instead of a vagina of course. With this type of sexual intercourse as I mentioned to ms. Stanley, it's important to exercise extreme caution. In order to avoid excessive pain, one must prepare the anal cavity before inserting the penis. Lubrication during anal sex is extremely important along with caution towards speed and intensity of the act as fast hard thrusts can leave lasting damage to your partner."

Carlisle stared between Edward and Jacob in confusion when another hand suddenly went up, "Jasper?"

"Is there a way to stop that from hurting?" The empath said with a frown as he glanced down at Seth with deep concern making Carlisle blink in surprise before he answered.

"Unfortunately no, like vaginal sex there really isn't a way to stop the initial pain. You can only put in efforts to minimise it by stretching the orifice and using lubrication." Carlisle watched Jasper for a moment when another hand caught his eye, "mr. Newton?"

"Does... Does it matter how _big _you are?"

The doctor tore his gaze away from his son and gave Mike an indulgent smile, "Yes, it does. But not in the way you think. While various sensations can be felt during sexual intercourse regardless of how underdeveloped you may be, an over-abundance in size can cause quite a few problems that can lead to pain and severe damage to your partner. In such cases lubrication is recommended to decrease the chances of any over stretching or tearing that might appear." Carlisle almost groaned when one of his children raised their hands again. "Yes, Emmett?"

"Is there a limit to how many times you can have sex?"

The doctor took a deep breath wondering why Emmett of all people would ask that question but he still answered if only to help those who really needed to know, "There's no set limit to the amount of times you can have sex," Carlisle blinked when Emmett grinned and turned towards the shifters as he mouthed, _'I told you so'_ to Embry causing the wolf to roll his eyes while the doctor continued. "But I would advise not to over exert yourself. Sex is a highly demanding physical activity and as such I must remind you all that caution is key."

The doctor almost squeaked when his other daughter raised her hand, "Alice?"

"You didn't go over lesbian sex either."

"Uhghm." Carlisle cleared his throat and spoke, "Well lesbian sex which is sexual intercourse between two women and has certain limitations but there are effective methods of copulation such as oral sex and mutual stimulation through masturbation and the usage of sexual props which serve as effective ways for release."

"Ms. Clearwater?"

"Are contraceptives necessary for that too?"

"Birth control methods aren't necessary for obvious reasons however the usage of condoms over sexual props and female condoms are always encouraged."

Embry raised his hand next and Carlisle took a deep breath, he doesn't know the shifter very well but from what he could tell the boy was shy and somewhat reserved meaning anything he was willing to ask in front of a crowded gym had to be important.

"Mr. Call?"

"What about kinks?"

Carlisle almost gaped, "Kinks?"

"Yeah like bondage and stuff." The hall broke out into snickers while Embry blushed furiously and Emmett seemed to be wearing a smug grin on his face. "Is it normal to be into that?"

"Well," Carlisle breathed, "We all have different methods of pre penetrational stimulation, or rather foreplay as it's commonly referred to, to increase the amount of pleasure during the sexual process. Acts like bondage and role-play are perfectly normal as long as both parties involved are consenting and these different stimulations are conducted safely."

Embry gave a nod and ducked his head down while Quil kept nudging him with a knowing smile when Jacob's hand went up, albeit a bit reluctantly.

"Yes, mr. Black?"

"What about... _bloodplay_?"

Carlisle paled considerably as he was thrown for a complete loop, "What?"

All eyes turned on the shifter, most of them were shocked and surprised and some of the students started whispering among themselves while Edward's eyes fixed on Jacob and the vampires bright gold eyes started to darken.

Jacob gave a heavy sigh while a dark blush spread all the way up to the tips of his ears. "I said bloodplay, is there a way to do that safely."

Carlisle's mouth fell open in a gape and it took a moment for the doctor to pull himself together enough to answer.

"Well, bloodplay is an incredibly dangerous method of foreplay mr. Black, I'll need you to understand that quite clearly. There are countless diseases and infections sexual or otherwise that can be contracted through this act. But with caution, and I do mean _extreme caution_, it can be done safely. Provided you and your partner are completely trusting of one another and you take all the safety precautions necessary such as testing for STD's and other diseases."

"The... I-" Carlisle looked like he was about to pass out as he watched Edward stare at Jacob with dark eyes while his tongue came out to lick his lips and he swears he saw a trail of venom dripping down the side of his face before he quickly wiped it away, while Jacob continued to flush. "I suppose the best way to go about it would be to limit the amount of blood shed to small proportions, create very shallow wounds and, clean and seal the wounds as quickly as possible after they've been made."

Jacob nodded quickly and raked a hand through his hair yet again. Carlisle wondered what on earth could be going through the boy's mind as Edward continued to stare and quite pointedly ignored Bella's questioning look when Seth raised his hand and Carlisle gave a sigh of relief.

If there's one person who's question he doesn't have to worry about it's Seth's, the boy is quite possibly the most innocent being Carlisle has ever met in his entire life and he'd even heard Edward say what a beautiful mind Seth has.

"Yes, mr. Clearwater. What's your question?"

"Is there a way to make deep-throating easier?"

Beautiful mind my ass!

"With, with practice most forms of sexual intercourse become easier to execute with time. So there aren't any quick fixes but it does get easier." Carlisle swallowed as he looked over the crowd almost afraid to ask, "Are there anymore questions?"

The students all stayed silent and Carlisle gave a quick nod, "Alright then, I think that's everything. If there are anymore questions please refer to the pamflets mr. Banner will hand out as you leave the gym and for any further questions please feel free to see... myself or any of the other doctors down at the hospital."

The gym slowly emptied, with the quiluetes being ushered to their bus as some avoided any and all eye contact and others seemed to be beyond amused, Carlisle promised himself to never do this lecture ever again.

**The End**

**A/N: so that was fun**

**Please review**


	2. One hour earlier

**A/N: I really wasn't planning a second chapter for this but I figured why not, it was fun and it didn't take long to do.**

**Usual apologies**

**Disclaimer: see first chapter**

"Edward~"

The quileute moaned as the vampire latched onto the side of his throat as he was pressed against a flat surface.

"Edward... Edward where's Bella?"

"Who?" Edward mumbled against the shifters throat as his hands slipped all over Jacob's sides.

"B-Bella, where is she?"

Edward shrugged as he nipped his way from Jacob's jaw up to his mouth and briefly nipped at the bottom lip. "I dunno."

"Edward!"

"Bella's fine she's with..." Edward almost paused as his Jacob high vampire mind somehow couldn't retrieve that piece of information as fast as it normally would. "Alice! She's with Alice. Now hush so I can have my way with you." The telepath mumbled out as he locked their lips in a deep kiss.

Jacob stumbled back as the vampire opened the door that he was pressed up against, while Edward continued to ravage his mouth. Plunging his tongue deep into the shifters throat as he coaxed the others appendage to come out and play while his hands went around Jacob's waist to pull the wolf as close to him as humanly possible.

Loud gasps and moans followed the two until Edward kicked the door shut with his foot and immediately moved to push the wolf back against one of the classroom walls.

_'I've missed you so much'_

Jacob's hands went up to tangle in Edward's hair when the telepath let one of his hands slip down to lift one of Jacob''s legs and hooked it around his waist, before giving a rough grind into the shifters lap earning a deep moan as he pulled back a bit and gazed into those blurry brown eyes to speak against the others lips.

"Jacob you have no idea how much I..." The vampire gave Jacob another searing kiss before he moved down to start kissing down the wolf's neck. "God, I love you so much it hurts."

Jacob groaned as Edward continued to rut into him and let out a slight gasp when the vampire gave a particularly sharp nip against his throat without drawing blood and he had to grasp the wall behind him to stop himself from collapsing on the floor.

Edward repeated the action causing a combination of anxiety, fear and excitement mixed in with a large dose of arousal to shoot right through him.

The shifter gave another gasp as Edward's hand tightened around his thigh while the hand he still had in the telepaths messy hair clenched, "Edward... Edward please."

The vampire's free hand moved down to the wolf's belt buckle when his thoughts suddenly came through loud and clear.

_'Bite me'_

Edward froze and pulled away from Jacob's neck to stare at the boy's lusty flushed face before he asked, "What?"

Jacob gave one hard grind into Edward's lap causing their aching cocks to brush up against one another and the vampire to lean his head down on the shifters shoulder as he started up their previous pace while Jacob spoke against his ear.

"I said bite me."

Edward shook his head as they continued to rut into each other and groaned out, "No."

"I want you to..." Jacob breathed before letting out a low moan. "I want you to bite me."

"You'll get hurt. Venom is dangerous for wolves-"

"You-you don't-ah-you don't do it for too long and then..." Jacob let his head fall back as he let out a groan. "Then you just suck the venom out."

Edward shook his head again, "No, it's too dange-rouse."

"Edward~"

_'Please I want you to'_ Jacob thought and gasped when he felt the vampire's cold lips brush against his heated skin. He couldn't help but moan as he thought of Edward opening his mouth just before his fangs grew out and he sank them into the wolf's skin. Jacob imagined in full detail how a trail of his own blood streamed down his skin onto his shirt, before collapsing into Edward's arms before the vampire layed him down onto the ground and started thrusting into him with his mouth still locked on that spot.

Edward's grip tightened even more as he watched the fantasy play out in Jacob's mind and a loud hiss erupted from his chest forcing the telepath to pull back and push Jacob back against the wall.

"No," the vampire took a deep unnecessary breath as he shook his head. "I can't do that Jacob."

Jacob tried to move closer only for Edward to keep him at arms length, "Why not?"

"I won't be able to control myself if I do."

"I trust you." The wolf said as he moved Edward's hands aside and wrapped his arms around the cold one's neck to bring him down for a deep kiss.

_'Do it'_

Jacob all but moaned in his head while Edward moaned into the kiss before pushing the shifter away once again, "No, I can't."

"Why not?" The shifter asked as he stared back into Edward's eyes and the vampire stared back.

"It could kill you Jacob and I just found you, I'm not willing to risk you losing your life."

Jacob gave an impatient sigh, "You're going to have to do it sooner or later Edward, we can't keep avoiding it."

"I know that, but there are so many risks involved I just..." Edward cupped the sides of Jacob's face as he leaned into kiss his forehead, "I want to keep you just like this for as long as I possibly can."

"Edwar-"

"I've waited a century to find you Jake, let me have a few more moments like this. Before I'm forced to turn you into a monster like me."

Jacob frowned, "You're not a monster Edward and I won't be either. How can I be a monster when I have you?"

"Just do it for me love." The telepath said, "Wait a little like I've waited for you."

Jacob sighed as the vampire leaned his head against his shoulder, "As long as you want... But I was thinking that maybe you could still-"

Edward frowned as he pulled back to look down at the wolf, "Still what?"

Jacob flushed a beautiful light red that was just barely visible through his skin as the last remnants of his fantasy came through with Edward lapping up the blood that was slowly dripping down his skin.

The telepath's eyes somehow became even darker than before, "I don't think that's a good idea."

"You won't have to bite me," the wolf tried as he pulled Edward down a little more and pressed a short sensual kiss against his lips. "I can cut myself or something and you can just sort of feed off of me."

"Jacob-"

"I heal fast so you don't have to worry about the wounds. This way you can get used to it, learn to control it for when you change me." Jacob explained as he kissed Edward again when the vampire just shook his head.

"That could just make things worse, I could become dependent on you and I don't want to treat you like my walking blood bag."

"Can't we at least try just once?" Jacob asked with a slight pout tugging at his lips which Edward smoothed out with his thumb as he spoke, "Jacob why would you even want me to?"

"No reason, I guess I just." The shifter shrugged despite the blush that coloured his cheeks. "I guess I just like the idea of you having a part of me."

Edward smiled. "Jacob I already have a part of you right here." The vampire took one of Jacob's hands and pressed it against his stone hard chest. "I feel your heartbeat in my chest almost like it's my own. Letting me feed off of you carries too many dangers that I don't want to risk."

"But-"

"How about this?" Edward interrupted as he gave the hand he was still holding onto a kiss. "We consult with Carlisle first, if he says it's alright then we can try. O.K?"

"Fine." The wolf sighed again before leaning up to give Edward a kiss when the door suddenly opened and they both looked up to find Alice walking into the classroom.

"There you are, I've been looking for you everywhere." The pixie said in exasperation as she walked up to the two standing in mr. Banner's classroom and she folded her arms over her chest. "Bella's waiting for you outside the gym."

Edward rolled his eyes as he went to stand beside Jacob with an arm wrapped around the shifters waist as he leaned his head against the other's, "So?"

"So I want to go spend time with Leah, you need to go spend some time with Bella."

"But she's so annoying." Edward grumbled causing Jacob to elbow him harshly as he gave him a glare.

"She's your girlfriend and she went all the way to Italy to save your emo ass."

"You're my mate, you went all the way to Italy to save my emo ass, Bella waited in the car with Alice." Edward said simply as he slid his free hand in his pocket. "It's you the Volturi are after not her."

"That doesn't change the fact that she still thinks you're her boyfriend Edward." The pixie said with an exasperated sigh, "Now go be a good boyfriend and distract her."

The wolf tilted his head to the side, "How did you guys actually manage to keep all this from the doc anyway?"

Alice shrugged, "The same way you all managed to keep it from Sam."

Jacob let out a brief chuckle while Edward gave a pout, "Why can't you watch her?"

"Because I've been watching her since the wolves got here and she's starting to get on my nerves." Alice huffed and Jacob couldn't help but scold.

"Alice."

"Oh Jacob you know I love Bella, but all she ever does is stand there and coo over Edward and I haven't seen Leah in weeks!" The pixie huffed before looking up at Edward with a glare, "It's not fair that you all get to spend time with your wolves but I can't."

"Why can't Emmett do it?" Edward whined again sounding like a four year old while Jacob just smiled as the vampire tucked his head in the side of his neck.

"He's holding Embry hostage in his jeep." Alice said dismissively, "I'm not sure what they're doing in there, but something tells me they're beyond the lecture Carlisle is going to give today."

Jacob laughed and Edward gave a grin when Alice suddenly looked between the two and asked carefully, so it wouldn't look like she was prying. "Are you two beyond Carlisle's lecture too or-"

Jacob flushed, "No! Yes! I mean-we... We havent-"

"We haven't gotten that far yet Alice."

Not all that surprising since Edward has been celibate since before he was turned and Jacob was still a virgin as well. Of course they knew the basics as to what went where, but somehow they weren't completely clear on the exact mechanics of how sex between men worked and Edward didn't want to hurt Jacob in anyway whatsoever.

Looks like the humans aren't the only one's who'll be learning something new today.

"What about you and Leah?"

Alice blinked and her eyes widened a bit until she looked away for a brief moment, "We've decided to take things slow."

"You don't know how lesbian sex works do you?" Jacob teased and much to his shock the pixie just glared back and snapped.

"I was turned at a time when saying the word _'vagina'_ in public could get you arrested, what do you think?"

Jacob laughed and Alice couldn't help but give an embarrassed smile when Edward spoke, "Didn't Rosalie give you those dvd's about-"

"Leah and I decided that we'd watch them together." Alice said shyly and Jacob smirked.

"Kinky."

"Yes well, I haven't gotten the chance to see her since I've been stuck watching Bella while you two slacked off on Laurent patrols." The pixie said with a glare aimed at Jacob and the wolf let out a growl.

"Hey how was I supposed to know that blonde guy was Laurent's real mate?"

Alice just rolled her eyes while Edward's pout returned.

"O.K well why can't Rosalie watch her?"

"She's with Paul, besides you know Rose has been threatening to kill Bella for months now. Do you really want to see what'll happen if we leave Bella in her care?"

"I doubt she'd do anything with Paul there." The telepath shrugged when Jacob spoke.

"Yeah, Bella got into an argument with Paul on the rez last week. He got so pissed off he phased so." The wolf gave a sheepish grin, "I really don't think he'd try all that hard to stop Barbie."

Alice pulled a face when Edward gave an exasperated sigh, "Jasper."

Alice's eyes widened again and she gave a strange little grin. "Jasper's busy."

Jacob frowned, "With what?"

"Trust me you don't want to know." The pixie said quickly and Edward's eyebrows furrowed in confusion for a moment as he stared at his sister when his eyes went wide and he cleared his throat.

"Oh."

"Oh what?" The wolf asked again as he looked between the vampires when the door opened again,

"Jasper took Seth to the history class," Rosalie said as she stepped into the biology class room with Paul following close behind, looking like he was trying hard not to laugh while Rosalie finished, "Apparently Seth wanted a... closer look at a weapon that was used during the civil war."

Paul gave a snort as he tossed his arm around Rosalie's neck and Jacob flushed when the innuendo clicked while his pack brother added, "Gotta say though Jake, he doesn't seem half as experienced as you look when you... tune Edwards flute so to speak."

The telepath's eyes went wide, Alice giggled and Rosalie laughed while Jacob just lowered his head in shame.

_'Damn mindlink'_

Eventually Edward gave a sigh as he rubbed his face in frustration, "Alice can't you stay with Bella for just a few more minutes?"

"No, I can't. I want to spend time with Leah and I'm going to do it whether you watch Bella or not." Alice growled sternly with a hell-bent glare and everyone knew the pixie's time with her wolf wasn't up for auction.

"We'll watch Bella." Paul offered.

"Oh sure, we'll take good care of the little lady." Rosalie nodded with a devious grin, "We'll take her into the forest where no one can hear her scream or find her body-"

"What Rose means to say is we'll take her for a walk in a nice secluded area so she can get some time to really think about her future. Somewhere private." Paul interjected with a meaningful look, making the blonde nod again as she continued. "Real private. We'll take her to some really cool spots, a cave, the top of a really tall tree...the edge of a cliff..."

"Rosalie." Jacob growled and the blonde rolled her eyes as she flipped her hair over her shoulder.

"Relax Jakey, I was only kidding."

"Oh Edward just go watch the human!" Alice finally snapped and Edward huffed.

"Fine!" The telepath then suddenly turned and pulled Jacob flush against his body, crushing their lips together in an instantly deep kiss.

Jacob had let out a muffled yelp of surprise before melting into it and running his hands through Edward's hair, causing the vampire to groan as his hands slipped up underneath the wolf's shirt to run over the hard edges and curves of his chest and stomach making the wolf gasp when a cold hand ran over his nipple. When the sound of a throat clearing and a loud cat call made them pull apart.

Edward glanced back over his shoulder to find Rosalie and Paul smirking while the wolf had a light blush on his face. While Alice stood glaring at them tapping her foot impatiently.

Edward looked back down at Jacob and gave him one more kiss before pulling away completely as he breathed. "We have to tell Bella."

"Yeah." Jacob managed to say as he fixed his clothes and hair when Alice just rolled her eyes and grabbed her brother's arm.

"Well maybe you can tell her today, now let's go Lala's probably been waiting for me for ages."

Edward groaned as he was dragged out of the class while Rosalie, Paul and Jacob just laughed as he left.

**The End**

**A/N: seriously though, I'm not doing another chapter...**

**At least not right now.**

**Please review**


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